Lydia Ohlmann- We Arrived!- July 10th

“Chief of sinners though I be, Jesus shed His blood for me”… Thank you to anyone reading, I think one could ponder or overthink for a while when thinking about how to start a blog post, let alone the fact that it’s open to the public. I chose this Bible verse as my intro since it had already been mentioned amongst the Zambia group and for the connections I’ve made with the verse in relation to this awesome blessing we are living here. Before the trip started, many times would the thought cross my mind of “With all the sins I struggle with, who am I to feel like I even have the ability to do this?”. The thoughts of self-doubt, worthiness, and fear of not living up to whatever expectation made its way into my frontal lobe, they all became very prominent the closer I got to leaving for Zambia. And while I think there is many Bible verses that flesh out this thought, I have always be fond of how hymn 342, Chief of Sinners Though I be (TLH), corresponds with the topic. I like it because it highlights the absolute magnitude of our sins, and there’s no escaping it. There’s no amount of lesson plan prepping that’ll somehow make me demoted to just the platoon sergeant of sinners, instead of the chief. Nope, I am the chief of sinners, higher than all others because I know the deep, dark, depth of my sinful flesh. Feeling this magnitude is crushing, especially thinking about being a teacher to all these children overseas. But, and I’m sure you can all see where this is going, Jesus shed His blood for me. With this second portion of the lyric, it’s all dependent on Jesus. This isn’t about the chief of sinners ability to teach a Bible story. No, this is about God’s will and trusting in the Holy Spirit to work in the hearts of all who hear the word on this trip. God sends us all to spread His word, and while we should always want to show our love by giving it our best efforts, it’s not about us. And thank goodness for that because if left on my own, without Jesus blood shed for me, my lesson plan would consist of a selfishly guilty and all around sinful girl just yapping along in, drowning in hypocrisy. This verse humbles me and helps me remember who is really in control of all things. So thank you God for protecting us so far with our travels to Zambia, and thank you God for sending your son to cleanse me, though I be the chief of sinners.

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